If youre working out in front of a mirror and watching your muscles grow, your ego has reached a point where it is now eating itself. Thats why I believe there should be a psychiatrist at every health club, so that when they see you doing this, they will take you away for a little chat. – Lewis Black
I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake. – Lewis Black
A father and two sons run Adelphia. Its a cable company. And they took from that company a billion dollars. A billion. Three people – three people took a billion dollars. What were they gonna do, start their own space program? Lets send the monkey to Mars, Dad! – Lewis Black
It is important for women to have a choice, to have an opportunity to plan their families, because if they dont, the Republicans have said this is an ownership society. You are on your own, and theyre going to begrudge that child everything, from WIC to a Pell Grant to health insurance. – Gwen Moore