When you read about a car crash in which two or three youngsters are killed, do you pause to dwell on the amount of love and treasure and patience parents poured into bodies no longer suitable for open caskets? – Jim Bishop
A newspaper is lumber made malleable. It is ink made into words and pictures. It is conceived, born, grows up and dies of old age in a day. – Jim Bishop
Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla. – Jim Bishop
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. – Jim Bishop
Since September 11, security has been increased everywhere, and we have new IDs to get on to the Fox lot. I drove to the security gate, but realized Id left my ID in my other car. I just broke into that voice – Hey, man, Im Bart Simpson. Who else sounds like this? The guard waved me through. – Nancy Cartwright