This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday… I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldnt let me – Homeland Security. – Art Buchwald
You cant make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All youre doing is recording it. – Art Buchwald
Whether its the best of times or the worst of times, its the only time weve got. – Art Buchwald
Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that havent been taxed before. – Art Buchwald
We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. – Robert Louis Stevenson, “Virginibus Puerisque II,” Virginibus Puerisque, 1881