My sense of humor is a turkey, and I pull it out of the oven and baste it in reality. – Tracy Morgan
I deal with my sons like young men. If they have a problem with something, they come to me. I am the type of dad that will drop everything I am doing for them, and always tell them to talk to me about it. – Tracy Morgan
I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider. All of them are predators. They are dangerous but its cool to have strong and powerful pets. – Tracy Morgan
Stand-up dont get no respect – its the hardest thing to do in show business. You dont have no band and theres no music. – Tracy Morgan
People and squirrels are very different. Most people will not argue that. But I find that there is one situation in which theyre very similar. And that is: when I am driving towards them in my car. Then theyre kind of hard to tell apart – especially if the human is kind of hairy. – Demetri Martin