President Clinton signed a $10 million deal to write a book by 2003. Isnt that amazing? Yes, and get this, not only that, President Bush signed a $10 million deal to read a book by 2003. – Conan OBrien
A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: Duh. – Conan OBrien
This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him. – Conan OBrien
Whats amazing is that Im recognized all over the world through Red Dwarf. British fans are exceptional, but the American fans are something else. Some of them fly 500 miles to stand in line for three hours, just to meet me, then when they do they collapse. It makes you feel like a rock star! – Craig Charles