If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses. – Lenny Bruce
The reason Im in this business, I assume all performers are — its Look at me, Ma! Its acceptance, you know — Look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma. And if your mother watches, youll show off till youre exhausted; but if your mother goes, Ptshew! – Lenny Bruce
A lot of people say to me, Why did you kill Christ? I dunno… it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know. We killed him because he didnt want to become a doctor, thats why we killed him. – Lenny Bruce
Whether if soul did not exist time would exist or not, is a question that may fairly be asked for if there cannot be someone to count there cannot be anything that can be counted, so that evidently there cannot be number for number is either what has been, or what can be, counted. – Aristotle