Ideally, the umpire should combine the integrity of a Supreme Court judge, the physical agility of an acrobat, the endurance of Job and the imperturbability of Buddha. – "The Villains in Blue," Time magazine, 25 August 1961

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Its funny. People often compare me to other humor essayists. Theyre usually quite nice comparisons I will accept those gladly. But I am always sort of appalled at the idea of being lumped with other, more chick-y female writers. And the truth is probably that neither comparison is accurate. – Sloane Crosley
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