If an article is attractive, or useful, or inexpensive, they’ll stop making it tomorrow; if it’s all three, they stopped making it yesterday. – Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

No one is listening until you fart. – Author Unknown

How is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person? – François VI de la Rochefoucault

Warranty – A notice telling the buyer when the product that was just purchased will no longer function. – Richard Turner (1937–2011), The Grammar Curmudgeon, a.k.a. “The Mudge,” fr