Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others. – Ambrose Bierce
Mammalia, n.pl. A family of vertebrate animals whose females in a state of nature suckle their young, but when civilized and enlightened put them out to nurse, or use the bottle. – Ambrose Bierce
Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook. – Ambrose Bierce
Wit – the salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out. – Ambrose Bierce
If Greece had gone through a very normal political life, I may have not been in politics. But just the fact that I lived through huge upheavals and very difficult struggles and polarization and the barbarism of dictatorships – that made me feel that we had to change this country. – George Papandreou