Psychiatry

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing – Joey Adams

Psychoanalysis pretends to investigate the Unconscious. The Unconscious by definition is what you are not conscious of. But the Analysts already know whats in it — they should, because they put it all in beforehand. – Saul Bellow

A psychotic is a guy whos just found out whats going on. – William S. Burroughs

A paranoid is someone who knows a little of whats going on. – William S. Burroughs

The human mind is indeed a cave swarming with strange forms of life, most of them unconscious and unilluminated. Unless we can understand something as to how the motives that issue from this obscurity are generated, we can hardly hope to foresee or control them. – Charles Horton Cooley

Psychoanalysis can unravel some of the forms of madness; it remains a stranger to the sovereign enterprise of unreason. It can neither limit nor transcribe, nor most certainly explain, what is essential in this enterprise. – Michel Foucault

Psychoanalysts seem to be long on information and short on application. – Gene Fowler

It might be said of psychoanalysis that if you give it your little finger it will soon have your whole hand. – Sigmund Freud

Half a psychiatrists patients see him because they are married — the other half because theyre not. – Arnold Glasgow

Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. – Samuel Goldwyn

The difference between psychiatrists and other mentally disturbed people is something like the relationship between concave and convex madness. – Karl Kraus

Considered in its entirety, psychoanalysis wont do. Its an end product, moreover, like a dinosaur or a zeppelin; no better theory can ever be erected on its ruins, which will remain for ever one of the saddest and strangest of all landmarks in the history of twentieth-century thought. – Sir Peter Medawar

Analysis brings no curative powers in its train; it merely makes us conscious of the existence of an evil, which, oddly enough, is consciousness. – Henry Miller

Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents shortcomings. – Laurence J. Peter

Work and love; these are the basics. Without them there is neurosis. – Theodor Reik