36 Curmudgeonesque Quotes to share with friends and relatives

Idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows. – David T. Wolf

The only thing that could spoil a day was people. People were always the limiters of happiness except for the very few that were as good as spring itself. – Ernest Hemingway

It is people who make me seasick—not the sea. But I am afraid that science has yet to find a solution for this ailment. – Albert Einstein, 1930

I do not believe in revealed religion — I will have nothing to do with your immortality; we are miserable enough in this life, without speculating on another. – Lord Byron, 1778-1824, letter to Rev. Francis Hodgson, 1811

[M]an is a machine made expressly for sorrow; he has only five senses with which to receive pleasure, and suffering comes to him through the whole surface of his body…. The man who does not suffer is an ill-made machine, an imperfect creature… – Claude Tillier (1801–1844), My Uncle Benjamin: A Humorous, Satirical, and

Sorrow hides behind all your pleasures; you are gluttonous rats which it attracts with a bit of savory bacon. – Claude Tillier (1801–1844), My Uncle Benjamin: A Humorous, Satirical, and

The enthusiastic, to those who are not, are always something of a trial. – Alban Goodier

All our lives we are putting pennies — our most golden pennies — into penny-in-the-slot machines that are almost always empty. – Logan Pearsall Smith

I never knew whether to pity or congratulate a man on coming to his senses. – William Makepeace Thackeray

Ever get the feeling that sometime early in your life there must have been a briefing that you missed? – Robert Brault, rbrault.blogspot.com

Nine-tenths of the people were created so you would want to be with the other tenth. – Horace Walpole

There is nothing so pitiful as a young cynic because he has gone from knowing nothing to believing nothing. – Maya Angelou, PBS, 1988 March 28th

A satirist is a man who discovers unpleasant things about himself and then says them about other people. – Peter McArthur

God made everything out of nothing. But the nothingness shows through. – Paul ValÃ©ry, Mauvaises pensÃ©es et autres, 1942

Oftentimes, when people are miserable, they will want to make other people miserable, too. But it never helps. – Lemony Snicket

The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs. – Charles de Gaulle