I do not believe in revealed religion — I will have nothing to do with your immortality; we are miserable enough in this life, without speculating on another. – Lord Byron, 1778-1824, letter to Rev. Francis Hodgson, 1811

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People who make puns are like wanton boys that put coppers on the railroad tracks. They amuse themselves and other children, but their little trick may upset a freight train of conversation for the sake of a battered witticism. – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., The Autocrat of the Breakfast-Table, 1858
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