Quotes by

Steve Burns

Im officially near-famous. If youve got four year old kids and youve got cable, then youve got no choice but to know who I am. But if youre one of my peers – a 26-year old guy who lives in Manhattan – you have no idea who I am. Im only famous if youre four. – Steve Burns

And I think that if I were a for real celebrity that was recognizable everywhere, Id just crawl under a rock and you know, have someone run over the rock with a car, or something. – Steve Burns

When I was a kid, my mom used to run the vacuum cleaner, and the noise would bother me so much that I would run into the woods to calm down. I feel like that vacuum cleaner has been on since I moved to New York City. – Steve Burns