There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter. – Billy Connolly
Once you become successful, people know where you live, the type of house you live in, the kind of car you drive, the clothes you wear, and so it would be patronising to go and talk like a welder. Weldings a mystery to me now. You cant go back, your life changes every day. – Billy Connolly
My parents used to take me to the pet department and tell me it was a zoo. – Billy Connolly
Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey… Doesnt try it on. – Billy Connolly
Nature looks dead in winter because her life is gathered into her heart. She withers the plant down to the root that she may grow it up again fairer and stronger. She calls her family together within her inmost home to prepare them for being scattered abroad upon the face of the earth. – Hugh Macmillan, “Rejuvenescence,” The Ministry of Nature, 1871