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Remember: “I” before “E,” except in Budweiser. – Author Unknown

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Party Invitation
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Like other parties of the kind, it was first silent, then talky, then argumentative, then disputatious, then unintelligible, then altogether, then inarticulate, and then drunk. When we had reached the last step of this glorious ladder, it was difficult to get down again without stumbling. – George Gordon, Lord Byron

Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down. – Phyllis Diller

She had heard someone say something about an Independent Labour Party, and was furious that she had not been asked. – Evelyn Waugh

Cocktail party: A gathering held to enable forty people to talk about themselves at the same time. The man who remains after the liquor is gone is the host. – Fred Allen

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