Having babies is fun, but babies grow up into people. - M*A*S*H, C

Having babies is fun, but babies grow up into people. – M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter, “The Price of Tomato Juice”

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There are no illegitimate children — only illegitimate parents. – Leon R. Yankwich

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Setting a good example for your children takes all the fun out of middle age. – William Feather, The Business of Life, 1949

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Give me the life of the boy whose mother is nurse, seamstress, washerwoman, cook, teacher, angel, and saint, all in one, and whose father is guide, exemplar, and friend. No servants to come between. These are the boys who are born to the best fortune. – Andrew Carnegie

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Diogenes struck the father when the son swore. – Robert Burton, “Anatomy of Melancholy,” Democritus to the Reader, 1621

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