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English is a funny language; that explains why we park our car on

English is a funny language; that explains why we park our car on the driveway and drive our car on the parkway. – Author Unknown

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He swore at us in German (which I should judge to be a singularly effective language for that purpose)… – Jerome K. Jerome, Three Men in a Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog), 1889

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Lymph, v.: to walk with a lisp. – From a Washington Post reader submission word contest

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The English language is rather like a monster accordion, stretchable at the whim of the editor, compressible ad lib. – Robert Burchfield

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Dictionaries are like watches; the worst is better than none, and the best cannot be expected to go quite true. – Samuel Johnson

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