No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office. – George Bernard Shaw
In the Middle Ages, they had guillotines, stretch racks, whips and chains. Nowadays, we have a much more effective torture device called the bathroom scale. – Stephen Phillips
A painter paints his pictures on canvas. But musicians paint their pictures on silence. We provide the music, and you provide the silence. – Leopold Stokowski
I just dont want to live like I used to. And at some point, Im going to put a gag order on myself in terms of talking about the past. Ive got to slam the door and deal with the present and the future. – Charlie Sheen
