Comedy, like sodomy, is an unnatural act. – Marty Feldman
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I always loved comedy, but I never knew it was something you could learn to do. I always thought that some people are born comedians … just like some people are born dentists. – Paul Reiser
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the Day: Cream of Asparagus. Ellen DeGeneres. – Ellen DeGeneres
We mustnt complain too much of being comedians — its an honorable profession. If only we could be good ones the world might gain at least a sense of style. We have failed — thats all. We are bad comedians, we arent bad men. – Graham Greene
Americas wealth comes from the efforts of people striving for success. Take away their incentive with badmouthing success and you take away the wealth that helps us take care of the needy. – Thomas Peterffy
Those who weep for the happy periods which they encounter in history acknowledge what they want not the alleviation but the silencing of misery. – Albert Camus