[E]ccentricity is absolutely without value on a Golf green. – John Strange Winter, “Ladies on the Green,” Golf Illustrated, 1899 July 28th
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The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life. – Chi Chi Rodriguez
The number of shots taken by an opponent who is out of sight is equal to the square root of the sum of the number of curses heard plus the number of swishes. – Michael Green, The Art of Coarse Golf, 1975
When widows exclaim loudly against second marriages, I would always lay a wager than the man, If not the wedding day, is absolutely fixed on. – Henry Fielding