While I gave up God a long time ago, I never shook the habit of wanting to believe in something. So I replaced my creed of everlasting life with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. – Sarah Vowell
Presidents and presidential assassins are like Las Vegas and Salt Lake City. Even though one city is all about sin and the other is all about salvation, they are identical, one-dimensional company towns built up by the sheer will of true believers. – Sarah Vowell
The lips on my upper right bicep are my girlfriends lips. She has the most amazing lips, and I wanted to carry them around with me everywhere I go, considering I cant carry her lips physically with me. So I decided to place them in a discreet location, such as the inside part of my bicep. – Jake Owen
How do people go to sleep? I’m afraid I’ve lost the knack. I might try busting myself smartly over the temple with the night-light. I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember any of the damn things. – Dorothy Parker, Here Lies, 1939