If you want to know the feeling, just take your bottom lip and pul

If you want to know the feeling, just take your bottom lip and pull it over your head. – Carol Burnett, about labor pain, quoted in Fatherhood by Bill Cosby

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Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes. – Joyce Armor

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A friend asked her doctor if a woman should have children after thirty-five. I said, “Thirty-five children is enough for any woman.” – Gracie Allen

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Never go to your high school reunion pregnant or they will think that is all you have done since you graduated. – Erma Bombeck

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Life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside. – Rita Rudner

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