Most of the arguments to which I am party fall somewhat short of being impressive, knowing to the fact that neither I nor my opponent knows what we are talking about – Robert Benchley
I argue very well. Ask any of my remaining friends. I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they dont even invite me. – Dave Barry
When I was in nursery school, the teachers asked me, yknow, What does your dad do for a living? So I said He helps women get pregnant! They called my mom and they were like, What exactly does your husband do? – Natalie Portman
