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If you had half as much brains as you have beard, you would have l

If you had half as much brains as you have beard, you would have looked before you leaped. – Aesop [Context note: The beard here mentioned is on a goat. The fox is speaking

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Mustaches
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[I]n bounded De Courci, hair and all! Cloak, hat, and hair were instantly thrown aside, and a smooth, young, laughing face revealed itself from behind whiskers, moustaches, imperials, and goatee. – T.S. Arthur, “Marrying a Count,” Off-Hand Sketches, A Little Dashed with Humour,

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Mustaches

There is always a period when a man with a beard shaves it off. This period does not last. He returns headlong to his beard. – Jean Cocteau (1889–1963), translated from French

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Mustaches

Make beard, not war. – Author Unknown

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Mustaches

So when people see mustaches now, they think hipster, not Hitler. And that, people, is the power of creative rebranding. – Kenya Barris, black‑ish, “Crazy Mom” (season1, episode4), original airdate

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Mustaches

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Id like to play Matt Damons daddy. Hes a wonderful actor, I really admire him, and Id like to play his dad one day. – Larry Hagman

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An erection is like the Theory of Relativity — the more you think about it, the harder it gets. – Author Unknown

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Sex

Having babies is fun, but babies grow up into people. – M*A*S*H, Colonel Potter, “The Price of Tomato Juice”

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Girls we love for what they are; young men for what they promise to be. – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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Miscellaneous