Casinos and prostitutes have the same thing in common; they are both trying to screw you out of your money and send you home with a smile on you face. – VPPappy

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My dad was the manager at the 45,000-acre ranch, but he owned his own 1,200-acre ranch, and I owned four cattle that he gave to me when I graduated from grammar school, from the eighth grade. And those cows multiplied, and he kept track of them for years for me. And that was my herd. – Dave Brubeck
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